Requiem

We go out in the world and take our chances
Fate is just the weight of circumstances
That’s the way that lady luck dances
Roll the bones.
Neil Peart; taken from Roll the Bones

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Requiem

Tonight I tried to write, but nothing came.
The silence of madness plagues the soul
as it continues to search for tomorrow.

And these words,
written here,
are not what I wanted on the page.

Why can’t I pour my soul
upon the page?
Is the soul’s complexity so great
the simplicity of words
cannot explain it?
I think not,
yet I cannot express
my inner most thoughts.

So I think of her,
of you
of them,
of me,
of us,
of today,
of yesterday,
of what was,
of what could have been,
and of what is not.

Solomon tells me nothing.

Are these pains in my chest fear
or the precursor of death?
Is this numbness in my mind insanity
or the instability of madness?
Is this sweat upon my face fear
or just a rendition of my insanity?

I think I am afraid to truly open
the door to my soul.

The fire dances among the logs tonight;
as the night air penetrates my senses.

My soul dances amongst the demons;
of which my grandfather once knew.
His photograph haunts me.

Our souls can no longer escape this existence.
And our souls are mixed with our grandparent’s;
their demons haunt us all.

Tonight’s damnation is nothing more
than the simplicity of the forevermore.

Requiem. – EjG

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This past weekend I realized I am not who I pretend to be; anxiety demeans the soul. I am not a worldly man; nor am I an overly educated, sophisticated man. I am of simple mind; of simple pleasures.

I can speak on the love of a guitar, the intrigue of language, the simplicity of the garden, and the beauty of the trail. I can even speak somewhat on poetry. But, I relegate myself to insignificance and focus on the triteness of my imperfections when in the presence of others. No more.

My crossroads.

I want to be a farmer, a poet, and writer of songs. A simple man; a respected man.

My crossroads, they’re taking me back to simplicity. – EjG

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Dudley Dee